Mom's Guide to the Galaxy

There was a little trouble getting back to West Haven, then Faris had to address a dragon situation.

When I reached the ship, Captain Vaughn was upset about the danger I was putting the ship in – as if anything other than this island was my fault – and demanded additional payment to take me back to West Haven. I talked him down to half of it.

The giant squid that attacked us en route to West Haven, for example, was not my fault. I rushed to a cannon, like many others, and managed to hit the creature with all four shots. Finally, after all that, I crawled into an empty hammock and slept until we docked in West Haven. My first stop was at a shop for some potions, knowing that Edvarius would be a tough opponent. Of course the guards spotted me immediately… lousy luck there. I only killed one of them before a whole swarm of them arrived and overpowered me.

They took me directly to Edvarius at the church cemetery, where he immediately seized the Dragon Staff, cackling about it securing his victory. I discretely sipped a potion of Aged Wine before asking Edvarius for more details, trying to stall his spellwork. He threatened to have me killed before completing the ritual. The dragon eggs back to crack and ooze, covering the skeleton, reforming muscles and tissue on it. I quaffed a Mental Elixir as the dragon let out a terrifying roar, trying one last time to interrupt this obscene ritual.

The guards released me at Edvarius’s signal, as soon as the dragon took flight. I whipped out my bow and shot it multiple times, carefully evading its attacks in the process. The dragon, Frothaerinvid, jumped down from the church room and began attacking random people. I shop him with another arrow, catching his attention as people fled.

I was firing furiously now, evading the dragon for the most part while peppering him with arrows. He reared back, opened his mouth, and blasted fire, engulfing the entire street. I ducked behind a stone pillar, evading the actual flames, though I still felt the heat.

The dragon started to fly away, struggling to do so with his oozing wings. I climbed a building, dashed across it, and leapt onto Frothaerinvid’s back. I clung to his rib cage as best I could, slicing my hands on his sharp bones. With Richard’s help, I stunned the dragon briefly, preventing it from biting me.

I knew I had to get the dragon away from the city, so I downed a Physical Elixir and used its horns to guide it towards the coastline. With the impending sunrise reflecting off the water, it occurred to me that the water might destroy the black ooze powering the dragon’s bones. I threw myself off his back as he crashed, though my landing in the water was no more graceful than his.

The ooze washed off his skeleton and dissolved into the water. The dragon stopped moving as its bones broke apart and floated to the surface. I swam back to the docks, climbed out, and collapsed for a few moments before the cries from the city drew me back to confront Edvarius.

Faris’s adventures on a ship, including learning a new skill that she’ll probably never need again. I mean, hopefully she won’t.

By the way, the 2022 Quest Calendar is available. Mine arrived this week.

Having arranged passage, I stocked up on some supplies for the trip. I watched as we sailed away from the city, enjoying the crew’s tradition of celebrating with a strong wine and some awkward dancing. It was supposed to be a three-day voyage around the island of Irulla. I joined in the work eagerly, and seemed to fit in well with the diverse crew. As a storm blew in, I helped fight off a harpy attack, then had a quick lesson on firing the canon, just in time for a pirate attack. I was thrilled when three of my four shots hit their targets. Then the pirates boarded and we were all engaged in hand-to-hand combat. I slayed three myself, though one managed to stab me.

I had no idea sailing could be so perilous. When we neared the Drighorn Islands, a siren’s call captured the crew’s attention. Captain Vaughn snapped me out of it, but many crew members were already jumping into the water. I raced to the cannons, shooting as many mermaids as possible before the crew could swim near them.

Once past those dangers, the captain allowed me to designate the order when searching the islands for Godwin’s vault. We stopped at Warmont Isle, where some monkeys stole a bit of gold, but returned it in exchange for some fruit. The Captain navigated through to Dayrain Reef, where I spent half a day climbing before finding the vault. As I neared the top, it became apparent that it was usually reached by magic. Luckily, I was able to find handholds easily for the climb.

The door to the vault presented a puzzle: a grid of letters with a clue overhead. I quickly deduced that the word started with “dr,” but tried “druid” before landing on the more obvious “dragons.” I quaffed a health potion as the door creaked open.

The door opened, revealing a magically enchanted circular room, with far more space than the door implied. I explored through a bedchamber, found some meal rations in the storage room, and set off a bird alarm in the garden – it squeaked “Intruder!” until I explained that Godwin had sent me. I found a health potion in his library, then discovered a locked chest in the last room. A quick search turned up a key, revealing more potions and some gold inside the chest.

My focus shifted to the Dragon Staff floating in a circle composed of light columns… magical, I assumed. I reached quickly between the columns to grab it, then fled as lightning flashed out from the circle, clearly trying to strike me.

After evading the lightning, I felt the entire cavern shake as a stone golem emerged from the wall. I hid behind a boulder, which improved my chances of hitting it without being hit… much. When it slumped back into a pile of rocks, I finally examined the Dragon Staff I was holding.

It was dark when I left the wizard’s vault, though not for long… the vault exploded, raining ash, rock, and lava down the mountain! I quaffed a Physical Elixir and ran down the mountain like my life depended on it, leaping over rivers of lava while covering my mouth to avoid inhaling volcanic fumes.

Some random encounters, a poor attempt to acquire some quick coin from a job board, and a (not terribly) shocking betrayal as Faris returns to West Haven.

When I went downstairs for breakfast, a couple thugs were roughing up the innkeeper. Some things are the same in every town. I interceded, of course.

Then I perused the local job board for some quick coin before continuing on my trip. An herbalist asked me to harvest a plant from the nearby swamp, but I couldn’t find any. A pair of neighbors were squabbling over ownership of a prized horse; I was able to retrieve it for the owner. I wasn’t able to steal his neighbor’s wife back though – the horse’s owner had the urn with her ashes. Who does that?

On the return trip to West Haven, I spotted a slave caravan. I started a rockslide as a diversion before confronting the slavers. The buffoon in charge laughed when I demanded they free the slaves, then charged at me with his goons. I left one of them alive to carry the message that slavers should reconsider their chosen career.

Again, arriving in West Haven, the guards tried to stop me, claiming they were supposed to “bring me in”… as if I weren’t already headed in. I considered bribing them to let me pass, but decided to be charming and persuasive instead. Not that it did me much good, as Edvarius revealed himself to be a villainous necromancer, with plans to abuse the items he had me retrieve in order to revive dragons under his control. His guards rushed to lock up Lord Fellmont, Rufus, and myself. We tried to fight them off, but there were just too many of them.

Victor Fellmont appeared displeased with his father, railing about his various mentors and revealing the damage he had done to the city while helping Edvarius. Then the guards seized all my equipment and tossed me into a dungeon cell.

After a poor night’s rest, I determined to escape. After a failed attempt at picking the lock (I’m really not good at that), I resorted to kicking and pulling at it until it finally broke. I surprised a guard on patrol, which gave a sword to fight with after I killed him.

I heard someone in a nearby cell, who revealed himself to be Godwin the Great. He told me of Edvarius’s plot, and that the missing Dragon Staff might be able to stop Frothaerinvid, the ancient dragon that Edvarius intended to resurrect, giving me directions to retrieve it in the Drighorn Islands, as his health was not up to the journey.

I set off in search of my equipment, sneaking through a narrow halloway and checking each room I came to. I found the kitchen and baths first, and locked some guards into the bath house as a precaution. Luckily, the next room held my equipment. I resisted the temptation to riffle through other prisoners’ gear.

Searching for the exit, I ran into a couple more guards who I dispatched quickly, catching only a scratch from one of their spears. Then I found a ladder to a locked hatch, which I resorted to forcing open.

I emerged in the upper city and rapidly made my way to the docks, seeking passage to the western isles. Word got out quickly, as one man recognized me as the escaped prisoner, but he happily accepted some coin rather than calling the guards. A dock worker, for a fee, directly me to Captain Vaughn of the Blind Buzzard. I quickly reached an agreement with the captain, paying only for my food and agreeing to work while at sea.

After a bit of dragon tomb raiding, Faris heads towards West Haven via Mirinvern. (In case you’re wondering about all the recent Quest calendar posts, I’m trying to catch up as we approach the end of the year/story. Next year’s calendar is available for purchase here.)

As I emerged from the mausoleum, a trio of gargoyles screeched and descended to attack me. My arrows whooshed through the air before they even got close, and they all thumped to the ground.

The return trip was a bit slow with all the dragon bones weighing me down. I had to revert to rations instead of hunting or foraging. My route to Mirinvern led me through a swamp, where I got stuck in a couple feet of mud and water. As I pulled myself out, a swamp creature attacked. It hit me once before I killed it, then a crowd of them rose from the mud behind me. I evaded all but one of them, and killed the others with help from Luc and Eggwin, only to see more rising. I fled. As I passed an enormous bat, I grabbed it, throwing it at a crocodile that was poised to strike at me. I glanced behind me once I reached a safe spot and saw the crocodile fighting the swamp creatures.

As I approached Mirinvern, I purchased a cart from a farmer and rested at his home for the night. He warned me of monsters destroying his crops and stealing from his herd. Sure enough, as I left the next morning, a giant worm erupted from the ground. It was a brief, yet desperate fight as I shifted into wolf form, and Richard swooped down to help at one point as the worm grabbed me in its mouth.

I moved up to examine the corpse and the ground collapsed beneath me. I managed to grab the edge, reducing the impact of my fall. The dust settled and I explored, hoping for an easy way out. I ran into another worm in the first cavern, fleeing to a second area where I found some jewelry and coins among scattered bones. The next cavernous area appeared ominous as I watched tentacles snake out of a hole and seize a mouse. I snuck quietly past. That, of course, led me to an area with another huge worm where a massive combat ensued between the beast, myself, and my animal companions.

With all the beast dead, I found a climbable tunnel where one of them had presumably surfaced. It was an easier climb that I expected. Later that day, I stopped at a tavern, resting for the night. Eggwin went search for food, and I did not see him again. Baby dragons, it turns out, and constantly hungry.

After being abandoned by her bodyguard, Faris continues on her search for the dragon skeleton in Mirinvern Forest.

We parted ways in the morning. Upon reaching the edge of Mirinvern Forest, I spotted the most beautiful deer I had ever seen. I cautiously approached. It seemed friendly enough, but stayed a little ahead of me, walking a bit, the pausing to see if I followed. It led me carefully through the forest, eventually leading me to a path.

Suddenly a branch swung out in front of me! I was being attacked by a living tree! I fought it off with some help from Richard, who swooped down and clawed at a branch.

There were more wondrous flowers here, some more dangerous than others, like the Dionea Fungus, a large carnivorous mushroom. While the leaves may be useful, I decided avoidance was a better approach. That wasn’t the only strange thing in the forest: I killed a giant spider that tried to eat me, then stumbled through thorny overgrowth and found a stone well with fresh water. There was even a clearing filled with gravestones dating back centuries. And then more living trees attacked me. I almost felt bad for killing them, what with being an invader on their land, but I’m also fond of living.

The next oddity was an iron gate in the middle of the forest. I considered picking the lock, but it was rusted over and wouldn’t budge. I looked for another way through, then climbed over the gate, cutting myself on some thorns in the process.

As I moved past the gate, I was astounded by the number of statues approaching a gargoyle-topped mausoleum. Then I noticed that my own feet felt heavier, turning to stone as I walked. I struggled to remain calm, then realized there was magic attacking my mind rather than my body. I regained control and the stone slowly dissolved.

Upon reaching the mausoleum, I realized the lock was an elaborate puzzle, well beyond my ability to repair and decode. Surprisingly, I was able to pick it. Inside, I descended into darkness along a set of stairs, then lit a lamp, revealing the bones of the ancient dragon, Frothaetinvid, and an altar dedicated to that dragon. Under the altar, I found a treasure chest which I bashed open, releasing a cloud of green gas to access some gold and treasure within. A fabulous dragon-shaped collar lay on the altar, so I placed it around my neck for safekeeping.

The adventure continues as Faris and her bodyguard set off for the Mirinvern Forest, encountering perils en route.

As we made our way through the mountain, a snow-covered beast attacked us. Kevin held it off while I peppered the monster with arrows.

It grew colder as we traversed the mountains. We came to a frozen lake and decided it was worth the extra time to circumvent rather than cross it, particularly as I recalled rumors of a monster under the ice. Those rumors were true, the monster burst out of the lake and attacked us. With Kevin running defense again, I attacked swiftly, destroying it with only one chunk of ice bouncing off Kevin’s armor.

We had finally reached a warmer area when a net dropped on me from a tree. I eventually cut the net away and stumbled to my feet as a giant insect erupted from the forest. I tripped as my foot caught in the net, shooting into the trees as Kevin valiantly defended me. The beast ran off.

Leaving the forest, we found a decrepit tower. It even had a warning: “Danger: Do Not Enter.” Failing to pick the lock or find another way in, I had Kevin smash down the door. I immediately headed to the top of the tower, planning to work my way down. As I ascended, a gargoyle head statue spit flames at me on the second floor. I actually stopped to rest for a bit after that, calling down to Kevin that we should stay here for a short while.

After a brief respite, I found an old book on the third floor, then proceeded to the top of the tower where I found a strange gelatinous blog. It was transparent, so I could see items, including bones, inside it as it oozed towards me. I shouted for Kevin as I fired arrows at it, then retreated down the stairs. As I fled the tower, I was puzzled by Kevin’s absence until I encountered a merchant who had seen him on the road a while before, remembering his purchase of several health potions. I suppose this task was too much for him.

Approaching nightfall, I chanced upon a caravan of travelers and made camp with them. They shared some delightful mead and raised my spirits after Kevin’s sudden departure. I told of my adventures, joined in the dancing, and even played some music for the group. Then I fed Eggwin, my baby dragon, and settled in for the night.